Slug & Lettuce, Doncaster

The Goose is a huge characterless high street pub that makes its money at the weekend when hoards of young’uns fill its bland interior. Every table has a menu on it advertising cheap pub co grub and there is a pay as you withdraw cash machine for those who want an extra sausage, or more likely a double up deal on spirits. Within the differing levels of seating is a pool table and a dartboard and throughout the pub there are numerous plasma screens that were showing muted rolling news and the BBC sports football programme. My visit was early on a recent Saturday afternoon when thankfully the pub was almost empty. There was some background music playing. The long bar on the right hand wall is stocked with standard draught products and I counted six hand pumps. Two of these were unused and the Old Speckled Hen and Wainwrights were both off leaving two hand pumps badged with Landlord. I had a pint of generic lager, as were the other two customers. Out the back are a few picnic tables for the smokers of Doncaster. I suppose that this pub serves it purpose, but I would compare it to a Wetherspoons without the beer selection. A bit crap really!

Although an interesting looking building, the interior has been gutted and it is set out like any modern vertical drinking establishment. There were three real ales on: Pedigree, Bombardier and Marstons EPA. The latter was advertised on the front of the pump as £1.59 a pint, but when I ordered two halves I was charged £1.78. I was curious as to the basis for this arithmetical sleight of hand, and was informed that it's against the law to sell a half for less than 80p! We got more pleasure out of this nonsense than we did out of the beer.