The Swallow, Uxbridge

This one doesn't seem to have changed much since previous reviewers' visits; it's still somewhat trapped between the busy road and the railway; still has the same outside drinking area with the shelter for smokers. The counter faces you as you enter the central door. It's essentially a two-room pub; the room on the right would have to be regarded as the public bar as it contained the dartboard, was bare-boarded and simply furnished and had (grey painted) matchboard paneling on the wall to three-quarter height. The room on the left is carpeted, had a settle, upholstered bench seating with normal tables and chairs and small round stool, and with fielded paneling on the walls, again to three-quarter height. This is a classic public and saloon bar layout, although here they are no longer separate rooms, being connected by archways. There are TVs on the walls of course, and in the saloon bar there were a couple of banners for Granuaile HC (whatever that is - Gaelic sporting team?). It's a Star (Heineken) pub, and in the way of real ales had on only GK IPA and Doom Bar (£1.75 a half). A small board on the counter advertised (and had on display under clingfilm) rolls and pork pies for £2 a pop. I would have been tempted had I not already polished off a 'spoons breakfast. There were also food menus on the tables during my midweek lunchtime visit. Hot sandwiches were from £2.25 (grilled chicken and bacon) to £3 (steak and onion). Main meals, focussing on pub grub, were around £7 - £9. This seems like good value I would say. I think that by most standards this is an ordinary pub. But I quite like ordinary pubs with no airs or graces. The Doom Bar was unusually good as well.

The pub's position is well described by Steve, below. It has tiny parking space at the front, entered through the station's bus lane and problematic to navigate when busy. On entering the shabby single bar, the senses are assaulted: there is a strong smell of stale something-or-other, the light is dull and uninviting, while the racket from the jukebox is highly annoying as it competes with the commentary from the live soccer on the telly. There is a games area at one end with a pool table and dart board. The barrman was welcoming enough, and there was one customer in who was as thick as a brick, unable to hold a conversation. Two ales on, Doombar and GK IPA, both average. More spit than swallow.

This pub is located in what feels like the middle of nowhere in between Hillingdon Tube Station and the extremely busy A40 (Western Avenue). I was surprised at how busy it was during my evening visit a couple of Saturdays ago, especially as most of the customers seemed to be Villa fans on the way back from their FA Cup exit. They may have lost, but there was still a good atmosphere in the pub which was helped by the friendly staff and random music from the 70s and 80s. I’d had a fair few beers before my visit, but I could swear there was also some big band music playing at some point. This is a U shaped pub with a pool table on the right hand side and I counted at least one plasma screen for showing Sky Sports. Only Greene King IPA was available as the Pride was off, but I had a decent pint of Guinness from the standard draught selection. There is some seating out the front where one can watch the cars and lorries fly past and there was also a massive smoking shelter for those rainy days. I liked it in here, but I think that it is a little out of the way for me to visit again.