Orleans Smokehouse, Upper Norwood, SE19

OK this is definitely into the camp of tick box exercises. I trekked down the stretch that is Beulah Hill to this Harvester restaurant. It has a bar at the side of the restaurant with an array of shiny taps that positively seemed to welcome drinkers. The bar is a pleasant carpeted area with nice lighting so as a venue absent quaff consideration it does tick boxes positively. Lovely and very welcoming bar staff adds to the positive experience. It falls down, as totally expected on beer choice. Wingman the session IPa from BrewDog as about eclectic as you would get here. Default to a pint of Guinness and it all felt OK! If anyone does another review of this venue in the next 11 years I would be utterly amazed. There is nothing near here, you will not encounter this place on your way somewhere else. There are no interesting drink choices and so unless you are a fan of ticking off both venues on here and Harvesters you are unlikely to follow my post. Actually the restaurant here was really busy at 7.30pm on a Monday evening so plenty of people do trek here!!

This is a large Harvester’s pub at the top of Beulah Hill. On entering, the bar is to your left, with a large, rambling restaurant extending some way to the right. My visit wasn’t timed very well, arriving in the middle of the lunch service to a chaotic scene of families waiting for tables to become free and impatient children testing their parents’ (and my own) nerves to the limits. The bar area had become some sort of ad hoc holding pen for anyone without a table, with just me and one other clinically depressed looking bloke trying to enjoy a pint. The room is carpeted with some sofas at the front and banquette, high stool and standard seating in the rest of the room. The walls are painted in pastel shades with some floral wallpaper in places and black and white photos hang alongside various framed pressed flowers and leaves. The pine bar back had some mock cask fronts which were made to look as if they were dispensing wine straight from the barrel. There was some music playing in the background but this was drowned out by the cacophonous kids and, had the weather been better, I wouldn’t have thought twice about taking my pint outside to one of the numerous picnic benches. No real ale on the bar, so a choice had to be made between keg Tetley’s and Old Speckled Hen. I plumped for the Hen, which actually tasted pretty good, although I was admittedly gasping for a drink at this point. The lone barmaid did pretty well coping with a relentless queue of thirsty punters. It’s a typical Harvester’s, so if you’ve been to one before, you should know what to expect. Understandably popular with families, but not unreasonably unpopular with me - if you want a decent pint, keep going into Crystal Palace, there are plenty of decent pubs there.