The Border Rambler, Carlisle

Good name, shame about the pub... One of the many Botchergate establishments, this one must be mayhem on a Friday or Saturday night, but not too boisterous on a Thursday evening (and playing better music than certain other places). That said, it has been unsympathetically treated during the various remodelling and refurbishments over the years. Apart from the traditional-style bar-back, most other elements are modern but plain, except for a clear space for dancing, fighting or whatever goes on here at the weekend. The faux-heritage signs saying "Broadmoor Criminal Lunatic Asylum", "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good" and "Cute but psycho" will help give the general impression. Anyway, no real ales of course, and even the keg Wm Younger bitter was off, so - inevitably - it was a John Smith's (£3.20) to finish off the night.