The One Tun, EC1

Semi-modern 'pub with rooms', all rather geometrical with square tables, square detailing on the painted 2/3rd-height wood panelling, square main window panes and square-patterned ceiling tiles. Decor limited to a selection of distinctly curious dog portraits... Two of three handpumps in operation, dispensing a 'house' The One Tun (£4.35) and Doom Bar.

Things have clearly changed since Mr C. was last in here and I doubt he'd approve. I wouldn't describe this place as 'gastro' as it serves - yawn - Thai food. That said, the interior is very modern 'mood gastro' in style. The ceiling is covered in what appear to be pressed patterned metal plates; naff. The tables have solid wood tops but with legs that look like giant Meccano painted black; naff. Music played at too loud a volume and a standard sized screen played sport, thankfully with the sound turned down. Clients appeared to be a few City types and a couple of geezers who looked like they might know their way around a local jewellery vault. Beer: Molson Coors One Tun, Gloom Bore (clip reversed) and Ubu's Purity at £2.05 a half which is fair for the area and was on good form. It's highly unlikely that I'd ever return here, the Bleeding Heart Tavern around the corner is better and that's not saying much.