Victoria Taps, SW1

I was racking my brains as to what this pub was originally called: the Warwick Arms - thank you Tris - then spells as the Elusive Camel and the Brougham. Sadly the interior has been buggered about with as much the name, a black and white tiled frontage does the bar counter no favours, the TV screens are too prominent and the musak is particularly naff. I suppose it might appeal to some types but not me. Ales on were TT Landlord, Doom Bar and London Pride, which proved to be undrinkable. I won't be rushing back.

Dating from 1828, this was originally the Warwick Arms, reopened a few days ago in the current form, though given the number of names this place has had, for how long this will remain is anyone’s guess. Either way, what original pub fabric there once was, has long gone. This is a completely modernised and in some respects, slightly industrial affair. The floor is new, the bar back is fabricated from very rough pine timbers and shiny white glazed tiles, which have been applied to some walls; there’s copper pipework too, which seems linked to brewing paraphernalia on high. A beer wall can be found here too, listing only keg beers along with the legend ‘It’s a Beautiful World at the Victoria Taps’ – hmmm. A suspended steel gantry is above the bar, which is totally modern, with a black and white tiled front, with a black and white patterned bar apron, which looks a bit Bridge Riley (see photo). Some walls are painted orange, white or shades of grey, with a heavily industrial bare brick fireplace, some structural members also being rough brick clad. There’s a raised area to the right, with games machines flashing away. Furniture is high and normal height modern, with some ginger coloured banquettes, looking a bit 1970s futuristic retro; tea lights are to tables. Lighting is of course, the filament variety, some emanating from exposed galvanised trunking to the white Anaglypta ceiling. Customers are twentysomethings and very vocal too. There were three real ales (of sorts), Doom, Pride and Landlord at £5.00 a pint and on good form, served by bar staff who seemed a bit confused, all wearing ‘Victoria Taps’ monogrammed black shirts. This isn’t a great place even for the immediate vicinity, so I don’t envisage a return visit. Rated 3.5.

Official site of Victoria Taps - www.craft-pubs.co.uk

Official site of Victoria Taps - www.craft-pubs.co.uk

No real ale in here, just lagers and cider. Nice open fire at the far end though.

Previously The Elusive Camel (and originally The Warwick Arms), this traditional Georgian pub, despite the grandeur of its red brick and white rendered facade, is a bit of a farce. There is no real ale, the clientele preferring experimental cocktails to proper beer. It was very crowded and noisy, the staff were brusque and unpleasant, the chesterfield sofas were draped with idiots and the atmosphere reminded me of the Chatham End at Priestfields Stadium when Fulham were visiting. This one can continue to elude me.