The Bridge House, Longham, Ferndown

Probably Dorset's most boring pub, The Bridge House was so dull that GK sold it off to become an independent carvery under the name City Grill. Now it's the Bridge House again, though still part of the Citylodge Group. It is principally a hotel and restaurant, and while it sits in a picturesque location next the the River Stour, the buildings have little appeal. There is an enormous gravelled car park, where travellers from Bournemouth Airport leave their cars if they're too tight to pay the airport parking fee, and a few disabled parking bays and a slip road at the front. The bar and dining room is large and rectangular, half carpeted and half laminate floored. It is mostly furnished with tables for diners, though there were a few barstools and a token high table for drinkers. There is also a small lounge bar to the side, designated a 'library'. The décor is plain and, well, dull. There is a decked terrace the full length of the back of the building with a few seats and tables, where you can admire the view of the meadows the other side of the river. There are several gaming machines and free wifi on offer. The staff are uninspiring, the clientele mixed – including the local lunatic, ranting about Abba to no-one in particular – and dogs are banned.Two ales on: I had a pint of Bridge House Ale, a flat, boring bitter manufactured by Coors, and I wish I'd had the Doombar. Fine for a low-excitement family lunch, but I don't see my coming back too often.